I'm not. The theme of this post is that I'm not physically flexible.

Me and Lester (Lester and I) have had a fabulous Tuesday night. A little wine, a little leftover pizza, and Bride & Prejudice.

Lester's been a testy bird all day, in spite of his singing and spending lunchtime in the sunshine on the balcony--he's been especially bite-ey. Usually he just uses his beak to say "don't pet me there" or "I want to go back to my cage (palace)," but today he actually chomped on my finger when I was offering him an almond! Really, it was ridiculous. He loves almonds! I put him back in his cage and played ragas, which he seemed to enjoy. He's a bit more mellow this evening, though.

~

I took a slightly less advanced yoga class this evening. The teacher of this evening's class practiced next to me during the class I took on Saturday that made me so sore. No wonder. I don't have the flexibility and the strength of an advanced student...Especially the flexibility (and I know that there isn't supposed to be an "advanced" in yoga), but I can never get warm in the beginning classes. I need a practice that's super vigorous so that I can get warm, but also focused on alignment.

I get that my muscles will never really extend unless I work them in the correct way, but I admit I'm frustrated. Why am I so very tense? It is not because I'm uptight. I've known several uptight but physically flexible people.

In many ways I belong in a beginner class because I still can't even put my hands flat on the floor in Uttanasana (standing forward bend. Kind of like touching your toes). But I have strength and awareness beyond the limitations of my flexibility--I can feel what is wrong with my alignment, but my shoulders or my hips won't budge.

I'm especially frustrated today. My teachers look at me before class and frequently say, "Oh, I can see you're a dancer." Standing, I look like a dancer, or someone who used to be. I have good posture, and my feet are almost always involuntarily turned out. Then, that they often, I think, assume that I'm still super flexible. I'm not!

Even when I was little, I wasn't. Blech.